Pretending to be someone other than who you are takes a lot of your energy.
If you don’t have permission or the freedom to be yourself, a large percentage of your energy will be spent pretending.
If you’ve been dealing with people and/or situations that require you to hide your true self, you already know it’s exhausting. You’re having to spend your own precious energy to fit into the box these people require you to be in, in order for them to be able to deal with you.
Hiding who you really are is different from role playing, from playing at being something you’re not. One of the magical things about movies and Hollywood is that people have permission to pretend to be who they want to be, and that’s a great thing. Pretending is fun because you can go back to being your true self anytime you like.
It’s important to remember who you actually are to begin with.
When you’re not able to be your true self, it can feel like you’re in a nightmare. A nightmare is terrifying because you can’t control it. Not being able to choose to be yourself can feel out of control too.
If you’ve been playing at being who you are not, and it’s not fun, you’re wasting your energy. Furthermore, you, the real you, won’t be seen. This is invalidating, and painful too. If you’re not able to have what you want, this could be the reason why.
If you’re invalidated about yourself, or think others will not accept you, it might be the time to own up and be yourself, completely.
Only you can do this.
It may have been convenient for others that you weren’t being completely you, and you complied. Hoping to coast along, you didn’t rock the boat. Only it’s not exactly working out for you if you’re not getting what you want, is it?
Imagine the joy and peace of mind you would feel upon waking each day, knowing you could spend all of your day ahead being who you truly are. Imagine a day in which you don’t have to defend yourself, or adjust to anyone else in order to get along in the world.
Another word for this is seniority, which means that you are the most important energy inside of your own space. Being senior means that, within you, other agendas aren’t as important as yours.
Every day is another chance to decide that it’s worth being who you already are. Sometimes you may need to do a little digging to remember what that is.
Some days you realize that you’ve moved past an old way of doing things and it’s time to reinvent.
‘Eagle Nebula’ found at Public Domain Pictures